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121 votes. |
A guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is
wallowing in despair, he has his first meeting with a demon...
Demon: Why so glum? Guy: What do you think? I'm in hell! Demon: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here. You a drinking man? Guy: Sure, I love to drink. Demon: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays that's all we do -drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, diet tab and fresca...we drink till we throw up and then we drink some more! Guy: Gee, that sounds great! Demon: You a smoker? Guy: You better believe it! Demon: All right! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from all over the world and smoke our lungs out. If you get cancer-no biggie-you're already dead, remember? Guy: Wow... that's awesome! Demon: I bet you like to gamble. Guy: Why yes, as a matter of fact I do. Demon: Cause Wednesdays you can gamble all you want. Craps, Blackjack, Roulette, Poker, Slots, whatever. If you go bankrupt... well, you're dead any how. What about Drugs?!? Guy: Are you kidding? Love drugs! You don't mean... Demon: That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack, or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all the drugs you want - you're dead, who cares. Guy: WOW! I never realized Hell was such a cool place! Demon: You gay? Guy: No... Demon: Ooooh (grimaces). You're gonna hate Fridays. |